• 0% interest for the life of the loan!!!
  • also it's not a loan1!!1!!11!one!
  • you don't ever have to pay back this money EVAR!*&#[conniptions]*%!@#!!

RUN DON'T WALK THIS OFFER WON'T LAST*

*actually it's liable to last a long time, especially if cnelson manages to become a vampire.